[BITList] Time to smile !? kids ?!

Thu Feb 4 12:01:16 GMT 2016

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*/Time To Smile/**/./**/
/*

*Photos of the new generation!
*B149570D83214031884EC72386A29EFD at OwnerPC

B4A6A0056CDE42FF9EE220A212DD1730 at OwnerPC
*NUDITY
*I was driving with my three young children

one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible

ahead of us stood up and waved.

She was stark naked!
As I was reeling from the shock,

I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat,

*/'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'/*

    7A410095C2F54967ABFD90AA92F50805 at OwnerPC
    *OPINIONS
    *On the first day of school, a first-grader handed

    his teacher a note from his mother.
    It read, */'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily
    those of his parents ...'
    /*

    53DD9C1AC542482E932E799E7E20C821 at OwnerPC
    *KETCHUP
    *A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.

    During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her

    4-year-old daughter to answer the phone..
    */'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now, she's
    hitting the bottle.'
    /*

    595CF6286D9B4D859C757762FF79E893 at OwnerPC
    *MORE NUDITY
    *A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's
    locker room.
    When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks,

    with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.

    The little boy watched in amazement and then asked,
    */'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'/*

    9DC1124931CE4105A36FF98B1BB30883 at OwnerPC
    *POLICE # 1
    *While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school,

    I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old.

    Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked,
    */'Are you a cop? /*

    */Yes,'/*I answered and continued writing the report.
    */'My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is
    that right?'
    'Yes, that's right,'/*I told her.
    */'Well, then,'/* she said as she extended her foot toward me,

    */'would you please tie my shoe?'/*

    E636D067ED934484BA19770E1BD617AE at OwnerPC
    *POLICE #2
    *It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of
    the station.

    As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking,

    and I saw a little boy staring in at me.
    */'Is that a dog you got back there?'/* he asked.
    */'It sure is,'/*I replied.
    Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van.
    Finally he said,

    */'What'd he do wrong ?????'/*

    149CA044ABE94339924A574C90D4A12F at OwnerPC
    *ELDERLY
    *While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly
    shut-ins,

    I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.
    She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age,

    particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs.
    One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass.
    As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions,

    she merely turned and whispered,

    */'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'
    /*

    *DRESS-UP
    *A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party.

    When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned,

    */'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.'
    'And why not, darling?'
    'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'
    /*

    7125A5B145154327880F0FCFCF6FA5E6 at OwnerPC
    *DEATH
    *While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church,

    our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his
    collar wilt.
    Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin.
    Feeling that proper burial should be performed,

    they had secured a small box and cotton batting,

    then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
    The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers

    and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought

    his father always said:
    */'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he
    goes.'
    /*/(I want this line used at my funeral!)/

    208E3FB10A78459BBAB0DB640C10CBB5 at OwnerPC
    *SCHOOL
    *A little girl had just finished her first week of school*/. /*

    */'I'm just wasting my time,' /*

    */she said to her mother. /*

    */'I can't read, /*

    */I can't write, and /*

    */they won't let me talk!'/*

    E8F0A2A048B141E68D2FBECE0763EE61 at OwnerPC
    *BIBLE
    *A little boy opened the big family Bible.

    He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.

    Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible.

    He picked up the object and looked at it.

    What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.
    */'Mama, look what I found,'/*

    the boy called out.
    */'What have you got there, dear?'
    /*With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered,
    */'I think it's Adam's underwear ?!'/*

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