[BITList] Advance Australia?

[FS]

        I absolutely love this, who-ever thought it up is a genius,
          they need congratulating.    Enjoy.

           Dear Ms. Gillard,
           Please find below our suggestion for fixing Australia 's economy.

           Instead of giving billions of dollars to banks that will
        squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use
        the following plan..
           You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

           There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force.

           Pay them $1 million each severance for early retirement with the
        following stipulations:

           1) They MUST retire.
           Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed

           2) They MUST buy a new Australian car.
           Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed

           3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage -
           Housing Crisis fixed

           4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university -
           Crime rate fixed

           5) They MUST buy $100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week .......
           and there's your money back in duty/tax etc

           6) Instead of stuffing around with the carbon emissions
        trading schemethat makes us pay for the major polluters, tell
        the greedy bastards toreduce their pollution emissions by 75%
        within 5 years or we shut them down.

           It can't get any easier than that!

           P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament
        pay backtheir falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances

           If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you
        know. Ifnot, please disregard.

           Grumpies of the World Unite
        ********************************************************
           Also .

           Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a
        nursing home.

           This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies
        andwalks.
           They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical
        treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of
        paying itout.
           They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be
        helpedinstantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.
        Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be
        ironedand returned to them.
           A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their
        meals andsnacks to their cell.
           They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.
           They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual
        counselling, pool and education.
           Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be
        free, onrequest.
           Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard,
        with
        gardens.
           Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.
           There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and
        the guardswould have a code of conduct that would be strictly
        adhered to.

           The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and
        unsupervised.
        Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week.  Live in a tiny room
        and pay$600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.
           Think about this (more points of contention):
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           THE AUSTRALIAN CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting
        aConstitution for Iraq ... Why don't we just give them ours?
           It was drawn up by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for
        centuries and we're not using it anymore.
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           THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
           The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments
        posted in acourthouse or Parliament, is this -
           You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal', 'Thou Shalt Not Commit
        Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of
        lawyers, judges andpoliticians...... It creates a hostile work
        environment.
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           Also;
           Think about this .... If you don't want to forward this for
        fear of
        offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It is time for
        us grumpyold folk of Australia to speak up!


        	

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