[BITList] Two Drops of Water ....

[John Feltham]

The SAS, the Parachute Regiment and the Police are sent on a survival  
weekend to see who comes out on top. After some basic exercises the  
trainer tells them that their next objective is to go down into the  
woods and catch a Rabbit, returning with it ready to skin and cook.

Night Falls...

First up-the SAS. They don infra-red goggles, drop to the ground and  
crawl into the woods in formation. Absolute silence for five minutes,  
followed by the muffled 'phut-phut' of their silenced rifle. They  
emerge with a large Rabbit shot cleanly between the eyes.

"Excellent' remarks the trainer.

Next up-the Para's. They finish their cans of lager, smear themselves  
with camouflage cream, fix bayonets and charge into the woods,  
screaming at the top of their lungs. For the next hour the woods ring  
with the sounds of rifle and machine-gun fire, hand grenades, mortar  
bombs and blood curling war cries. Eventually they emerge carrying the  
charred remains of a rabbit.

'A bit messy, but you achieved your aim, well done' says the trainer.

Lastly, in go the Coppers, walking slowly, hands behind backs  
whistling Dixon of Dock Green. For the next few hours the silence is  
only broken by the occasional cackle of a walkie-talkie 'Sierra Lima  
Whisky Tango Fanta One, suspect headed your way..etc.

After what seems an eternity, they emerge escorting a Squirrel in  
handcuffs.

'What the hell do you think you are doing?' asks the trainer. 'Take  
this back and get me a rabbit like I asked you five hours ago"

So back they go. Minutes pass. Minutes turn to hours, night drags on  
and turns to day.

Next morning the police return holding the handcuffed squirrel, now  
covered in bruises, one eye nearly shut.

'Are you taking the piss!!??' asks the now seriously irate trainer.

The police team leader nudges the squirrel, who squeaks:
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"Alright, alright, I'm a ******* rabbit!'



ooroo

Bad typists of the word, untie.