[BITList] Tools Explained -- A Learning Experience

FA franka at iinet.net.au
Thu May 31 15:22:40 BST 2018


>
> TOOLS AND HOW TO USE THEM
>>>
>>>         Mail Attachment.jpeg
>>>         SKIL SAW:
>>>         A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.
>>>         Mail Attachment_1.jpeg
>>>         BELT SANDER:
>>>         An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor
>>>         touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
>>>         Mail Attachment_2.jpeg
>>>         WIRE WHEEL:
>>>         Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under
>>>         the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes
>>>         fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about
>>>         the time it takes you to say, 'Oh shit.'
>>>         Mail Attachment_3.jpeg
>>>         DRILL PRESS:
>>>         A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat
>>>         metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in
>>>         the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the
>>>         freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the
>>>         corner where nothing could get to it.
>>>         Mail Attachment_4.jpeg
>>>         Channel Locks:
>>>         Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation
>>>         of blood-blisters.
>>>         Mail Attachment_5.jpeg
>>>         HACKSAW:
>>>         One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board
>>>         principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked,
>>>         unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence
>>>         its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
>>>         Mail Attachment_6.jpeg
>>>         VISE-GRIPS:
>>>         Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt
>>>         heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used
>>>         to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
>>>         Mail Attachment_7.jpeg
>>>         OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
>>>         Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects
>>>         in your shop and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting
>>>         the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to
>>>         remove a bearing race.
>>>         Mail Attachment_8.jpeg
>>>         TABLE SAW:
>>>         A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood
>>>         projectiles for testing wall integrity.
>>>         Very effective for digit removal !!
>>>         Mail Attachment_9.jpeg
>>>         HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
>>>         Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have
>>>         installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle
>>>         firmly under the bumper.
>>>         Mail Attachment_10.jpeg
>>>         BAND SAW:
>>>         A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to
>>>         cut large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit
>>>         into the trash after you cut on the inside of the line
>>>         instead of the outside edge.
>>>         Mail Attachment_11.jpeg
>>>         TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
>>>         A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the
>>>         crap you forgot to disconnect.
>>>         Mail Attachment_12.jpeg
>>>         PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
>>>         Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for
>>>         opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil
>>>         on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to
>>>         strip out Phillips screw heads.
>>>         Mail Attachment_13.jpeg
>>>         COMMON SCREWDRIVER:
>>>         A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert
>>>         common slotted screws into non-removable screws and
>>>         butchering your palms.
>>>         Mail Attachment_14.jpeg
>>>         PRY BAR:
>>>         A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or
>>>         bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
>>>         Mail Attachment_15.jpeg
>>>         PVC PIPE CUTTER:
>>>         A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.
>>>         Mail Attachment_16.jpeg
>>>         HAMMER:
>>>         Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays
>>>         is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most
>>>         expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
>>>         Mail Attachment_17.jpeg
>>>         UTILITY KNIFE:
>>>         Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard
>>>         cartons delivered to your front door. Works particularly
>>>         well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in
>>>         plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and
>>>         rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work
>>>         clothes, but only while in use.
>>>         AND THEN THE
>>>         SON OF A BITCH TOOL:
>>>         Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage
>>>         while yelling 'Son of a bitch' at the top of your lungs. It
>>>         is also, most often, the next tool that you will need to do
>>>         the job.
>>>
>
> Mike Pohler
> mspohler at earthlink.net <mailto:mspohler at earthlink.net>
> 850 556-4891
>>>
>>>
>>> TOOLS AND HOW TO USE THEM
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> SKIL SAW:
>>> A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.
>>>
>>> BELT SANDER:
>>> An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up 
>>> jobs into major refinishing jobs.
>>>
>>> WIRE WHEEL:
>>> Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the 
>>> workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and 
>>> hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to 
>>> say, 'Oh shit.'
>>>
>>> DRILL PRESS:
>>> A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar 
>>> stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and 
>>> flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted 
>>> project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing 
>>> could get to it.
>>>
>>> Channel Locks:
>>> Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of 
>>> blood-blisters.
>>>
>>> HACKSAW:
>>> One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board 
>>> principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, 
>>> unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its 
>>> course, the more dismal your future becomes.
>>>
>>> VISE-GRIPS:
>>> Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If 
>>> nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense 
>>> welding heat to the palm of your hand.
>>>
>>> OXYACETYLENE TORCH:
>>> Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects in your 
>>> shop and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside 
>>> the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
>>>
>>> TABLE SAW:
>>> A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood 
>>> projectiles for testing wall integrity.
>>> Very effective for digit removal !!
>>>
>>> HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK:
>>> Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have 
>>> installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly 
>>> under the bumper.
>>>
>>> BAND SAW:
>>> A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut 
>>> large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash 
>>> after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
>>>
>>> TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST:
>>> A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the crap you 
>>> forgot to disconnect.
>>>
>>> PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER:
>>> Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening 
>>> old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; 
>>> but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips 
>>> screw heads.
>>>
>>> COMMON SCREWDRIVER:
>>> A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common 
>>> slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.
>>>
>>> PRY BAR:
>>> A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket 
>>> you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
>>>
>>> PVC PIPE CUTTER:
>>> A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.
>>>
>>> HAMMER:
>>> Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used 
>>> as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts 
>>> adjacent the object we are trying to hit.
>>>
>>> UTILITY KNIFE:
>>> Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons 
>>> delivered to your front door. Works particularly well on contents 
>>> such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector 
>>> magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially 
>>> useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.
>>>
>>> AND THEN THE
>>>
>>> SON OF A BITCH TOOL:
>>> Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while 
>>> yelling 'Son of a bitch' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most 
>>> often, the next tool that you will need to do the job.
>


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