[BITList] "Idle Thoughts"

[John Feltham]

G'day Folks,

I have just read this article on another Forum and I thought that it was interesting reading!




Another in my "Idle Thoughts of an Idle Mind" series
 
Higher Maths ... or a Mental Aberration ?
 
From my earliest days in Miss Bonners' Infant Class in the little 3-room village school, I have been fascinated by the subject of numerology the science of numbers. The wonders of learning the "up to 15-times" multiplication tables ...  the joys of sliding balls along wires on the huge abacus - (my first computer) - that adorned one complete wall of that classroom.  A second wall was covered with huge examples of the alphabet in perfect copperplate handwriting.
 
Later, in Miss Roberts' Junior class, each day started with a 20-question, 15-minute session in mental arithmetic.   In the evenings a favourite practice of my Grandfather was setting me ever more difficult mental arithmetic problems an example follows ...
 
"I go to Bedford market with 12 Chickens and 2 Pigs that I sell for 1 shilling and 3 pence apiece, and 2 poumds 15 shillings each respectively. Then, per Grandma's orders, I buy 3-1/2 yards of ½ inch elastic at 3 pence a yard, two bottles of meat paste at 7 pence a bottle, and one of those big enamel kettles for 2 shillings and 4 pence. How much will I bring home ?"
 
On a good night he might allow a couple of minutes for the correct answer !
 
In later years this led me to the world of codes and ciphers - the development of business management systems - the occurrence of naturally occurring numeric sequences and statistical analysis. In the late 1950's pre-electronic desk-top computer days, the use of slide rules for routine engineering calculations was supplanted by ever more sophisticated mechanical calculating machines, such as the Friden and Marchant concepts. The ultimate units were the so-called Square Root machines. It turned out that one of my then fellow aerodynamicists had a similar fascination with numbers ... lunch hours turned into a contest to find sequences of numbers and operative routines that would produce the most satisfying mechanical Music or rhythm for the longest time.
 
"Clickety clickety whirr click clickety pause click clickety etc ... !"
 
Sadly, the introduction of the increasingly sophisticated hand-held and desk-top calculators put an end to such pleasures !
 
A further innovation - the development of the muti-segment digital display -  led to the virtual demise of the traditional "Mickeys big hand is on the nine" clocks of old. No longer would flight controllers be able to say
 
"BA 747 G-ABC ... you have an F.27 at nine o'clock on collision path !"
 
and get the answer ...
 
"Can you be more specific ... we have digital watches.   Ah ... I have the little Fokker in sight !
 
Moving along with advancing years, as I approached the realm of senility, I found I needed to develop new ideas in order to keep my mind functioning at a reasonable level of competence. The result ... "Time Products !"
 
The game goes as follows. You awake from a deep sleep at some indeterminate hour of the early pre-dawn hours ... perhaps the call of the little room down the hallway beckons. You raise your head reluctantly from the softness of the pillow and glance at the ever present digital clock ... "4:27 !"
 
Immediately you call to your sleeping partner with a strident ...  "One Hundred and Eight !"
 
This normally brings no response but on certain satisfying mornings, a sleepy "Ugh ... What ?" reveals the fact that there is no need to call the family quack for a post-mortem evaluation. Some mornings, perhaps after a late night, the fact that the clock now says "11: 46", may slow the response time a bit before the magic "Five Hundred and Six !" escapes your lips.
 
A later development of the game can be used in waking hours with money matters. It works best when played in places like Wally World or your favourite supermarket. Instead of utilising ones' bed partner as the foil, it is a well known fact that highly educated check-out clerks can make reliable substitutes. The new version of the game goes somewhat like this
 
CLERK: 14.37 !
 
to which you reply
 
"That's Five Hundred and Eighteen !"
 
In general, the response will be a look of bewilderment on the clerks' face ... on a good day one might even get a "Duh ???"
 
Beware however of playing the game with elderly female clerks ...  those that were born and educated before the advent of electronics ... they may already know your little secrets of the abacus !



Did it make you smile? And think?

ooroo