[BITList] Call centre conversations

[FA]

**
>
> *Actual call centre conversations **???**
>
> Customer:     'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get 
> through to enquiries, can you help?'.
> Operator:     'Where did you get that number from, sir?'.
> Customer:     'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'.
> Operator:     'Sir, they are our opening hours'.*
> *-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**
> Samsung Electronics**
> Caller:          'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
> Operator:     'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking 
> about'.
> Caller:          'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly 
> states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC  wall socket 
> and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number 
> for Jack?'
> Operator:      'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.*
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> *RAC Motoring Services**
> Caller:          'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I 
> am travelling in Australia ?'
> Operator:      ' Doesn't the product name give you a clue?'*
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> *Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France ):
> 'If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering 
> wheel to the other side of the car?'
> *----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> Directory Enquiries***
>
> *
> Caller:               'I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in 
> Cardiff please'.
> Operator:          'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling 
> correct?'
> Caller:               'Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar 
> but the 'B' fell off'.
> *----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
> Operator:        'Woven? Are you sure?'
> Caller:             'Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in 
> Scotland *'.
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> **On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a 
> phone box told a worried operator:
> 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the 
> number on'.
> *----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> Tech Support:      'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
> Customer:             'OK'.
> Tech Support:      'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
> Customer:             'No'.
> Tech Support:      'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
> Customer:             'No'.
> Tech Support:      'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up 
> until this point?'.
> Customer:            'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 
> 'click''.*
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> Tech Support:          'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the 
> screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
> Customer:                 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'
> *----------------------------------------------------------------------*
> Caller:  'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just 
> realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will 
> I have my file back again?'.
> *-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*
> There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a 
> long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This 
> is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed 
> from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to 
> say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently 
> suing the Word Perfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'.
> Actual dialogue of a former Word Perfect Customer Support employee. 
> (Now I know why they record these conversations!):
>
> Operator:         'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
> Caller:              'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
> Operator:         'What sort of trouble??'
> Caller:              'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a 
> sudden the words went away.'
> Operator:         'Went away?'
> Caller:              'They disappeared.'
> Operator:         'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
> Caller:              'Nothing.'
> Operator:         'Nothing??'
> Caller:              'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
> Operator:         'Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out??'
> Caller:              'How do I tell?'
> Operator:         'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
> Caller:              'What's a sea-prompt?'
> Operator:         'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the 
> screen?'
> Caller:              'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't 
> accept anything I type.'
> Operator:         'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
> Caller:              'What's a monitor?'
> Operator:         'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks 
> like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
> Caller:               'I don't know.'
> Operator:          'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and 
> find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
> Caller:              'Yes, I think so.'
> Operator:         'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if 
> it's plugged into the wall.
> Caller:              'Yes, it is.'
> Operator:         'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice 
> that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
> Caller:               'No.'
> Operator:          'Well, there are. I need you to look back there 
> again and find the other cable.'
> Caller:               'Okay, here it is.'
> Operator:          'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged 
> securely into the back of your computer.'
> Caller:               'I can't reach.'
> Operator:          'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
> Caller:               'No.'
> Operator:          'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and 
> lean way over??'
> Caller:               'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right 
> angle - it's because it's dark.'
> Operator:          'Dark??'
> Caller:               'Yes - the office light is off, and the only 
> light I have is coming in from the window.
> ' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
> Caller:               'I can't.'
> Operator:          'No? Why not??'
> Caller:               'Because there's a power failure.'
> Operator:  'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it 
> licked now.
> Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your 
> computer came in??'
> Caller:               'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
> Operator:           'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and 
> pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the 
> store you bought it from.'
> Caller:                'Really? Is it that bad?'
> Operator:            'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
> Caller:                 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I 
> tell them??'
> Operator:            'Tell them you're too  stupid to own a 
> computer!!!!!'*
>
>


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