[BITList] Winston!!

[FA]

its been around before but might still rise a smile
frank

> *Winston Churchill*
>
> *Churchill loved paraprosdokians, figures of speech in which the 
> latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected.*
>
> **
>
> 1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
>
> 2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's still on my list.
>
> 3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright 
> until you hear them speak.
>
> 4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
>
> 5. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
>
> 6. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it 
> in a fruit salad.
>
> 7. They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to 
> tell you why it isn't.
>
> 8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is 
> research.
>
> 9. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out, I just wanted pay checques.
>
> 10. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of 
> emergency, notify:' I put "DOCTOR."
>
> 11. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
>
> 12. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the 
> street ... with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.
>
> 13. Behind every successful man is his woman.  Behind the fall of a 
> successful man is usually another woman  // and Visa-Versa
>
> 14. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
>
> 15. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute 
> to skydive twice.
>
> 16. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live 
> with.
>
> 17. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
>
> 18. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
>
> 19. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever 
> you hit the target.
>
> 20. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
>
> 21. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
>
> 22. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than 
> standing in a garage makes you a car.
>
> Finally:
>
> 23. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but now it’s getting harder and 
> harder for me to find one.
>


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