[BITList] Proofreading is truly a dying art!

[FA]

A smile for the day

*Proofreading is truly a dying art!*

        *Did I read that sign right?*

        *“TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW.”*

        *In a Laundromat:*

        *AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE*

        *ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT.*

        *In a London department store:*

        *BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS...*

        *In an office:*

        *WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE
        BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS
        WILL BE TAKEN.*

        *In an office:*

        *AFTER TEA BREAK, STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT*

        *AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD.*

        *Outside a second-hand shop:*

        *WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC.*

        *WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?*

        *Notice in health food shop window:*

        *CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS...*

        *Spotted in a safari park:*

        *(I sure hope so.)*

        *ELEPHANTS, PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR*

        *.*

        *Seen during a conference:*

        *FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T*

        *KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR.*

        *Notice in a farmer's field:*

        *THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE*

        *FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.*

        *Message on a leaflet:*

        *IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL*

        *YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS.*

        *On a repair shop door:*

        *WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON*

        *THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK.)*

        *Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?*

        *Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife*

        *And Daughter*

        *This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called
        the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. *

        *It took two or three readings before the editor realized that
        what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction
        the next day.*

        *Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says*

        *Really? Ya' think?*

        *----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Police Begin Campaign to*

        *Run Down Jaywalkers*

        *Now that's taking things a bit far!*

        *---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian*

        *Takes Over*

        *What a guy!

        **---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Miners Refuse to Work after Death*

        *No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!

        **---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
        **See if that works better than a fair trial!*

        *----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *War Dims Hope for Peace*

        *I can see where it might have that effect!*

        *----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly,*

        *It May Last Awhile*

        *Ya' think?!*

        *----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures*

        *Who would have thought!*

        *---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain;*

        *Police Suspect Homicide*

        *They may be on to something!*

        *--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges*

        *You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?

        **--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Man Struck By Lightning:*

        *Faces Battery Charge*

        *He probably IS the battery charge!*

        *--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *New Study of Obesity Looks for*

        *Larger Test Group*

        *Weren't they fat enough?!*

        *--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Astronaut Takes Blame for*

        *Gas in Spacecraft*

        *That's what he gets for eating those beans!*

        *--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*

        *Kids Make Nutritious Snacks*

        *Do they taste like chicken?*

        **********************************************************************************

        *Local High School Drop-outs Cut in Half*

        *Chainsaw Massacre all over again!*

        ************************************************************************************************

        *Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors*

        *Boy, are they tall!*

        *************************************************************************************************

        *And the winner is...*

        *Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead*

        *Did I read that right?*

        ***********************************************************************************************

        *
        ***

        	


        	




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