[BITList] NEW blond jokes--again

FA franka at iinet.net.au
Sat Feb 15 12:08:57 GMT 2014




------------------------------------------------------------------------

*FIRST DEGREE
*
*A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning**.**
The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment, and said:
/'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!'/ and hung up.
The husband said, /'Who was that?' /
The wife answered, /'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the 
coast is clear.'/**
*
*SECOND DEGREE
*
*Two blondes are walking down the street.
One notices a _compact_ on the sidewalk, and leans down to pick it up.
She opens it, looks in the mirror and says,/'Hmm, this person looks 
familiar.' /
The second blonde says, /'Here, let me see!' /
So, the first blonde hands her the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, /'You dummy, it's me!'/
*
*THIRD DEGREE
*
*A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and 
buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door
she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, now the blonde is really 
angry.
She opens her purse to take out the gun, but as she does so,
she is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, /'No, honey, don't do it!!!'/**
**The blonde replies, /'Shut up, you're next!' /
*
*FOURTH DEGREE
*
*A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, ... I know 'em all.'
A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of _Wisconsin_?
'The blonde replies, Oh, that's easy... it's W.' *

    *_
    _**FIFTH DEGREE
    *
    *Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was
    pregnant?
    A: /'Is it mine?' /
    *
    *SIXTH DEGREE
    *
    *Bambi, a blonde in her 4th year as a UCLA _Freshman_, sat in her US
    government class.*

        *The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was
        about.**
        Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said,
        'That was the decision George Washington had to make before he
        crossed the _Delaware.'
        _**_
        _**SEVENTH DEGREE
        *
        *Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her
        house ransacked and burglarized.
        She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
        The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9
        unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.**
        As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash,
        the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the
        cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.**
        Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find
        all my possessions stolen.
        I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a
        BLIND policeman!'*

        =========================

        *
        *


        */EVEN IF YOU ARE BLONDE, YOU HAVE TO LOVE THIS LAST ONE:/**
        *
        *Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks
        when a truck went past loaded up with rolls of sod.*

        */"I'm going to do that when I win the lottery," /**announced #1
        Blonde./
        "Do what?"/ asked #2 Blonde./
        "Send my lawn out to be mowed."/*



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