[BITList] MORE WAL-MARTIANS
FA
franka at iinet.net.au
Mon Aug 11 01:20:29 BST 2014
Here it comes again - your weekly dose of pictures to make you feel
good about yourself!!!!
MORE WAL-MARTIANS
They just keep coming
*776
**You have no idea how exhausting it can
be putting on tight purple sweat pants!! *
*Pensacola, Florida*
**
*I call a new rule at Wal-mart: If the
hole in your jeans is big enough for me
to slip my hand inside and sneak a
little squeeze, then by golly you best
be on guard! The squeezer, however,
retains the right to either squeeze or
not to squeeze!*****
*Sarasota, Florida*
**
*Unfortunately, the only strap working
on this entire outfit is the one holding
that hideous hair in place. Is that
former Federal Reserve Chairman Paul
Volcker's wife or is that Paul Volcker?***
*Los Angeles, California*
cid:image007.jpg at 01CA433B.938DB6B0
*Don't laugh! Its okay, because Bambi's
granddaughter borrowed her skirt. Plus,
today is combination Casual Friday and Crazy
Hair Day, all rolled in to one.*
*College Station, Texas*
*Apparently, Lester Flem doesn't know
whether he's homosexual, heterosexual,
bisexual, pansexual, polysexual, or asexual.
However, if you look up the word
'Transgender' in the dictionary......
BINGO!!!! There you will see a picture
of dear old flaming Lester in his boots.*
*Laguna Niguel, California*
*Where exactly does one buy a short pink
outfit like this to beef shop in?*
*Birmingham, Alabama*
**
*So, this is either a cross-dressing
nautical Popeye enthusiast OR....****well,
fill in anything. *
*It really doesn't matter, because
nothing we say will make any sense. Who
lets these people out of the house
un-championed?***
*Destin, Florida*
**
*Those purple shorts are HOT!!! I saw those
same shorts one time on an elephant in a
circus in Belarus . The house shoes make
the outfit!***
*Columbus, Ohio*
**
*Whatever happened to No Shirt, No Shoes, No
Service? Is that a turban on his head or a
serving of Jiffy-Pop? Is the girl in the
background taking a picture or teaching
the guy in the black wife beater T-shirt to
play, "Here is the church and here is the
steeple. Open it up and here are the
people!" Is the chick in the green bikini
top putting on makeup? Honey, you should
have saved your money and purchased either a
T-shirt or a case of Slim Fast.*
*Baton Rouge, Louisiana*
**
*Agerton? ........... Is that you? What do
you expect me to say? That's exactly what
he looks like from the rear. True, I've
never seen Agerton in heels. Still, if
I told you there is a picture where purple
hair is the least weird thing going on,
would you have believed me? Honestly, is
that a man or a woman or is Lester Flem back
in the store?*
*Mobile, Alabama*
*
**Britney Spears let herself go again.*
*Slidell, Louisiana*
**
*Dear Mrs. Razzlebone-Karbofski, it was cute
to dress your boys Festus and Cletus alike
when they were two years old, but at 45?
Well, not so much! ..... Suddenly, Festus
says, "Hey, Cletus, I been thankin. If my
truck could travel faster than the speed of
light, would my headlights work?"*
*Tifton, Georgia*
**
*I am so embarrassed. Seriously, I have no
idea how this photo of my son's 5th Grade
history teacher and part-time Gun
Care Instructor, Miss. Cinnamon
Goodpicker, got mixed in with this roll of
film.***
*Katy, Texas*
*Packing this rear in camouflage shorts is
like trying to hide an elephant behind a
squirrel.*
*Seattle, Washington*
**
*For some reason, I have to assume that no
matter where Zebulon goes, “Dueling Banjos”
suddenly starts playing from out of nowhere.*
*Atmore, Alabama*
**
*And men claim they can't meet classy women
in stores? Go figure!*
*Louisville, Kentucky*
*Is that a THONG Ollie Hopnoddle
is wearing?? I can't look again or I'll go
blind.*
*Mountain Brook, Alabama*
*770
**For my own sanity, I have to assume
that Gussie Klothgrunt is shoplifting two
pork roasts in her shirt. Simply because
there is no possible way that can
be anything other that two pork roasts in
her shirt. Can't be!*
*Forestdale, Alabama *
*
**No way, Laquanda, absolutely not! That
outfit does not at all make you look like a
Hooker.*
*Midlothian, Virginia*
**
*Aw yes, don't you just love the holiday
season in Easley!! I hope Abe is buying
some new shirts.*
*Is it really necessary to say ANYTHING ELSE???*
*Easley, South Carolina *
**
*On first glance, did it appear to anyone
else that Gisella's dog is coming out her butt?*
*Orem, Utah*
*316
**It's like a big pink garbage bag filled
with creamed corn and door knobs.*
*Houston, Texas*
**
**
*Mesmerized here at the Wal-mart Hiring
Center , Pinetop thinks this is his lucky
day because his mechanic called an hour ago
and said, "I couldn't fix your brakes, so I
made your horn louder." Besides, all his
redneck buddies told him he was a lock to
get this job at Wal-mart, provided he can
remember not to smoke weed or drink beer
during the job interview.*
*Austin, Texas*
*This is perfectly understandable. Elena
Kagan was just on her way to the Country
Club when she remembered she need some
coffee and a couple of yoga videos. Besides,
she thought to herself, I'll just throw on
these gray shorts and I'll be **smokin’.***
*Nashville, Tennessee*
**
*Don't worry, I've already forwarded this
picture to Burberry Worldwide in London . I
thought it would be beneficial for them
to be reminded of why they got into the
fashion and design industry in the first
place. I'm sure Burberry will be ecstatic
over seeing their vision spring to life.
Exciting, too, is how Lulu's slippers simply
make those shorts POP!!*
*Did anyone notice her boyfriend is wearing
an Auburn T-shirt? Don't look at me! I
didn't take the picture or tell Tater to go
to Wal-Mart in the middle of the night with
his flashy runway model girlfriend.***
*Opelika, Alabama*
*BURBERRY'S NEW MARKETING SLOGAN:
"WE THINK YOU'LL NOTICE, WE'RE NOT WAL-MART"*
*http://www.burberry.com/en-row/springsummer2010/#/rur*
*Is that a baby dangling from Raylene's
waist like a fanny pack??? I don't believe
I've ever seen anything like that before.
The only thing wrong with the gene pool
around the Ozarks is there's no lifeguard.***
*Fort Smith, Arkansas*
750
*I love talking with Freidagurtz
Finkelstein, because she always seems so
surprised and interested in what I have to say.*
*Grand Rapids, Michigan*
*Holy Golden Illusions of Grandeur, I gotta
get me that outfit!!!!*
*Alpharetta, Georgia*
**
**
*Toss in some cat food and Cooter is the
loneliest guy in town!*
*Fort Payne, Alabama*
*Someone else can try to figure out what
she's doing, because I have to go wash my
eyes out with bleach.*
*Oxford, Mississippi*
*781
**Either that lady has a tail or Barney is
stuck where the sun doesn't shine.*
*Loves Park, Illinois*
**
*I'm not sure what kinky Bathsheba Squeal
plans to do with that pie filling, but there
is just something about her that tells me
she doesn't bake, she doesn't watch Rachael
Ray and she has no intention of using that
pie filling in the kitchen.*
*La Verne, California*
*
**I have infinite admiration for the sheer
strength of good quality denim. Moreover, I
will be eternally thankful
if Honeysuckle's jeans wait until she
reaches the truck to explode. Seriously,
they should consider using denim on the next
NASA space shuttle.*
*Spring, Texas*
*For those times when you need fried okra
and chicken strips so bad, that you just
can't wait for the bleach to set.*
*Montgomery, Alabama*
**
*Is it even legal to sell that shade of
pink? I love the way Ms. Incense Berkowitz
color coordinated her reusable shopping bag
to match her shoes, purse, leggings, shirt,
jacket, earrings and necklace. If a bra had
been necessary, do you think for one
second it would have been any color other
than SHRIEKING PINK??***
*Glendale, California*
**
*I warned Ronnie not to wear that shirt out
of the house. Please, someone go provoke
him. I want to see him whack somebody upside
the head with a two 2-liter bottle of Squirt!*
*Brewton, Alabama*
------------------------------------------------------------------------
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