[BITList] Fwd: [AUGNQ] It's raining, lighten up a bit

[Michael Feltham]

HAS THIS HAPPENED TO YOU


IDIOTS IN SERVICE: This week, our phones went dead and I had to contact the
Telstra repair people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m. and
7:00p.m. When I asked if they could give me a smaller time window, the
pleasant gentleman asked, "Would you like us to call you before we
come?" I replied that I didn't see how he would be able to do that since our
phones weren't working. He also requested that we report future outages by
email.

(My email works over a telephone line?).


IDIOTS AT WORK: I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase
when the clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the credit
card.

She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the
card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to
compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the 
credit
card in front of her. She carefully compared the signature to the one I had
just signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.


IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD: I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had
a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request
the removal of the Koala Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too many
Koala's were being hit by cars and she didn't want them to cross there 
anymore.


IDIOT SIGHTING #1 I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without
your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge,
how would I know?" She smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."


IDIOT SIGHTING #2 The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with a co-worker of mine when she asked 
if I
knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when
the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people
doing driving?"


IDIOT SIGHTING #3 At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear co-worker
who is leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was
spoken. We all just looked at each other with that Cow-in-the-headlights
stare.


IDIOT SIGHTING #4 I work with an individual who plugged her power board
back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system
would not turn on.


IDIOT SIGHTING #5 When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working 
feverishly to unlock
the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side,
I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
"Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which he replied, 
"I know -
I already got that side."

Now don't you feel better

Ron