[BITList] "Naval"-gazing
franka
franka at iinet.net.au
Mon Feb 21 00:01:18 GMT 2011
This might be funny, if it wasn't so close to the truth!!
frank
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*Three New Navy Ships Of Interest
*
*1) USS REAGAN****(US NAVY)
*
*Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its
size into perspective.....****ENORMOUS!
*
*cid:1.2503245262 at web59609.mail.ac4.yahoo.com
*
*When the Bridge pipes ' Man the Rail' there is a lot of
rail to man on this monster:****shoulder to shoulder, around
4..5 acres.**
**Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full
complement.**
**Capability**
**Top speed exceeds 30 knots,****powered by two nuclear
reactors that can operate for more than 20 years without
refueling
**1.****Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years
**2.****Carries over 80 combat aircraft**
**3.****Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft
going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet
**Size**
**1.****Towers 20 stories above the waterline
**2.****1092 feet long; nearly as long as the Empire State
Building is tall
**3.****Flight deck covers 4..5 acres
**4.****4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing
66,200 pounds
**5.****2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weighing 50 tons
**6.****4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000
square feet
**Capacity**
**1. Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel**
**2.****Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90
days
**3.****18,150 meals served daily
**4.****Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of
fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes
**5.**Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable
and wiring 1,400 telephones*
*6.****14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets are carried
*
*2)HMAS**KEVIN RUDD* (AUSTRALIAN NAVY)
*The HMAS KEVIN RUDD sets sail today from it's home port
of Brisbane **
**cid:2.2503245263 at web59609.mail.ac4.yahoo.com
*
*This ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a
standing legacy to Ex PM Kevin Rudd 'for his foresight in
military budget cuts' and his conduct while holding the
(formerly dignified) office of Prime Minister.**
*
*The ship is constructed entirely****from recycled
aluminum cans collected by The Greens and is completely
solar powered with****a top speed of 5 knots.****It boasts
an arsenal comprising of one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft
which, although it cannot be launched on the 100 foot
flight deck, forms a very menacing deterrent to
recreational fishermen on Morten Bay.
*
*As a standing order there are no firearms allowed on board.**
*
*This crew, like the crew aboard the HMAS JULIA GILLARD, is
specially trained to avoid conflict and to appease illegal
immigrants and enemies of Australia at all costs.**
*
*An onboard Type One Universal Interpretor can send
out****messages of apology in any language to****anyone who
may find Australia offensive.****The number of apologies
are limitless and though****some may seem hollow and
disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound
very sincere.
*
*In times of conflict,****the HMAS KEVIN RUDD has orders to
seek refuge at Christmas Island..**
*
*3)HMAS JULIA GILLARD* (AUSTRALIAN NAVY )
*This ship will be used to ferry illegal immigrants across
the Arafura Sea from Indonesia to Australia in time to
pick up their welfare checks from the Labor Government each
Month as advance payment for their democratic vote once
they become Australian citizens.**
*
*cid:3.2503245263 at web59609.mail.ac4.yahoo.com
*
*Details of the specifications of the HMAS Julia Gillard
are in line with her namesake's economic policies, very
rusty, full of holes and a total mystery.
* *But don't worry...Admiral Swan is formulating yet
another plan!*
Regards
*Jim Flockhart
*JDF Consulting Services
Oilfield Cementing Specialist
Mobile Australia [61] 412240469
PO Box 78 Torrensville
Adelaide South Australia 5031
Australia.
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