[BITList] Aussie Kulcha

[John Feltham]

"........ I come from the land down under."   
   
    YEH, WE'RE ALL SUCH A SMART BUNCH DOWN UNDER
 

Rural Australian Computer Terminology 
 A  little  bit of Aussie  Kulcha.....  
 LOG ON:                           Adding wood to make the barbie hotter. 
 LOG OFF:                         Not adding any more wood to the barbie. 
 MONITOR:                       Keeping an eye on the barbie. 
 DOWNLOAD:                  Getting the firewood off the Ute. 
 HARD DRIVE:                  Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies. 
 KEYBOARD:                    Where you hang the Ute keys. 
 WINDOW:                         What you shut when the weather's cold. 
 SCREEN:                          What you shut in the mozzie season. 
 BYTE:                                What mozzies do. 
 MEGABYTE:                   What Townsville mozzies do. 
 CHIP:                                 A bar snack. 
 MICROCHIP:                  What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips. 
 MODEM:                          What you did to the lawns. 
 LAPTOP:                          Where the cat sleeps. 
 SOFTWARE:                   Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster. 
 HARDWARE:                  Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart. 
 MOUSE:                          The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed. 
 MAINFRAME:                 What holds the shed up. 
 WEB:                                 What spiders make. 
 WEBSITE:                       Usually in the shed or under the verandah. 
 SEARCH ENGINE:       What you do when the Ute won't go. 
 CURSOR:                        What you say when the Ute won't go. 
 YAHOO:                            What you say when the Ute does go. 
 UPGRADE:                     A steep hill. 
 SERVER:                        The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch. 
 MAIL SERVER:             The bloke at the pub who brings out the counterlunch. 
 USER:                               The neighbour who keeps borrowing things. 
 NETWORK:                    What you do when you need to repair the fishing net. 
 
INTERNET:                    Where you want the fish to go.

NETSCAPE:                  What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net

ONLINE:                           Where you hang the washing.   

OFFLINE:                        Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough. 



 
 
 
 

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