[BITList] Scotch and Soda

[John Feltham]

 Scotch and Soda

Johnnie’s Religion
 
Here lies Johnnie Pigeon
What was his religion?
Whatever desires to ken
Strong ale was ablution
Small beer, persecution
A dram was memento mori
But a full flowing bowl
Was the saving his soul,
And port was celestial glory.
 
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Scotch and Soda
 
Talking to a landlord in the bar, the stranger remarked, “What will you bet that if you give me a mixed Scotch and soda I don’t drink them separately, the Scotch first and the soda afterwards?”
 
“It can’t possibly be done,” replied the landlord, “but at any rate, here is a double Scotch and a straw; so let me see what you can do”.
 
Mixing his drink and with a cautionary “Now, watch”, the stranger put the glass to his mouth and gulping down the entire contents said,” That’s the first time I have ever lost”.

 



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