[BITList] The Gunfighter

[John Feltham]

The Gunfighter

Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, an up and coming gunfighter  
recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who, in his day had the  
reputation of being the fastest gun in the West. The young cowboy took  
a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and told him the  
story of his great ambition. 'Do you think you could give me some  
tips?' he asked.
The old man looked him up and down and said, 'Well, for one thing,  
you're wearing your gun too high. Tie the holster a little lower down  
on your leg.' 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young  
man.'Sure will,' replied the old-timer.

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and  
shot the bow tie off the piano player.'That's terrific!' said the hot  
shot. 'Got any more tips for me?'

'Yep,' said the old man. 'Cut a notch out of your holster where the  
hammer hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw.' 'Will that make me  
a better gunfighter?' asked the younger man. 'You bet it will,' said  
the old-timer.

The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his  
gun in a blur and then shot a cufflink off the piano player. 'Wow!'  
exclaimed the cowboy, 'I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?'

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. 'See  
that axle grease in the can over there? Smear your gun with it.'
The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on  
the barrel of his gun. 'No,' said the old-timer, 'I mean smear it all  
over the gun, handle and all.' 'Will that make me a better  
gunfighter?' asked the young man.

'No,' said the old-timer, 'but when that Wyatt Earp gets done playing  
the piano, he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, ....and it won't  
hurt as much.'





ooroo

Bad typists of the word, untie.